Between Jobs

Well, I am out of Qwest and waiting to go Ball Aerospace. I have a lot of butterflys about the whole transition, but I know that we are always waiting for something.

I remember seeing a World War II movie when I was young that featured a scene with two men in a fox hole waiting for the next wave of Japanese to overrun their position. Woefully outnumbered.

In the quiet between the waves of soldiers, there was silence and a temporary peace that allowed the men to reflect. The first man to speak remarked that his whole life consisted of waiting. Waiting to grow up, waiting for his first kiss, waiting to get married, waiting for his first son to be born...waiting to go to war and now waiting for... he could not tell what his outcome would be, but he could be waiting for his death. What happened to the men, I don't remember, just the existential moment of that reflection.

Why that particular scene of a movie stuck in my head, I will never know, but it has provided some kind of perspective to me to know that we are all going through stages of existence and we are waiting for the next stage to begin and waiting for immortality to begin.

Basketball Glory

I was playing basketball at the 20th Street Gym yesterday and I have to say that I was doing very well playing with some guys that are half my age. I thought "Not bad for a guy at my stage of life". I made great shots and gave some of them, lessons in moving to the basket.

I was just feeling pretty good about myself, when one of the young guys that I have played a few times told me, "You must been really good in your day". My day? I thought this was my day. Today was my day I thought. The old age thing again.

While it was really meant to be a compliment and well intentioned, it reminded of Patton and his story of the Roman Generals, who would return from a victorious battle and riding their chariot into an adoring crowd with a servant whispering into the ear of the General, "Glory is Fleeting". A reminder to appreciate it now, because it will disappear like a wisp of smoke.

Yes, my days on the court are fleeting and make me appreciate even more the fact I can still "run and gun". At least a little longer.

Woody's Movie

Last night I saw "Match Point" written and directed by Woody Allen, who I enjoy in the comedic sense, but whose nihilistic outlook, at least portrayed in this movie, I did not agree with. The movie is an excellent cinematic creation, but it's too bad that he takes the position that all is random and there is only luck and justice is not an immutable inevitability. The box that is drawn around this premise is a bit short sighted since it never shows what ultimately happens to Chris Wilton, a tennis player who marries into a rich aristocratic family, who has an affair and kills his lover, who is pregnant. Wilton conceives and achieves evil and avoids arrest through a "lucky" break of evidence presenting itself to divert the police from his guilt. Allen contends there is no poetic justice and perhaps the only thing that punishes Wilton is his own guilt. Then again, he states that guilt can be swept under the rug and you can simply push on.

It is an interesting aside picked up by Ben, my son, observed in connection with the murder of Wilton's lover. She is pregnant and Wilton insists that she get an abortion, which she is rife to do. So Wilton decides to kill her since it inconveniences his newly obtained life style. It is an interesting observation that her refusal of abortion became murder of both herself and the baby, perhaps as an extension of one another based on the same rationale.

All in all, a brilliant movie, however I felt it about its misguided theme concerning the ultimate questions of life.

Depression & Cognitive Functioning

Interesting article today in the WSJ about role of depression as a risk factor effecting the memory, problem solving and mental acuity, perhaps even shrinking parts of the brain related to these attributes after the age of 65. The article, titled, "How Depression Weakens the Brain" describes the current literature with regard to cognitive deficits and bouts of depression. The study cited was a comparison of healthy versus depressed (60 years or older) subjects and the configuration of cognitive dysfunctions in both. The depressed subjects showed a significant amount of these deficits.

There was also a description of anatomical studies showing patients with chronic depression have a smaller hippocampus than healthy patients. The hippocampus is thought to be responsible for memory. Treatment of the depression reduces the risk. There are studies that relate this to Alzheimer's.

So...what are we to conclude...a positive attitude promotes a healthy brain, memory retention and good mental function perhaps into old age.

This all points out one lesson to me. I need to watch more Marx Brother's movies.